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Ok, this seems like a little thing but why do they put holes in bagels?  I'm sure it's just tradition, but maybe it's time for the bagel to evolve a little bit. 

You see, when starvinmarvin is making his breakfast in the morning, the one thing that bugs him more than anything else is having to wipe a big glob of molten butter off of the countertop after it dripped through the hole in the bagel. As I'm sure everyone on this site knows well, buttering/cream cheesing/jamming/whatevering an item with a hole in it, such as a bagel, is like 100 times harder than buttering a nice, flat, solid piece of bread.  It takes quite a lot of control and knife technique to avoid the hole.

When you think about it, it's a pretty stupid design.  What was the original bagel inventor thinking putting a hole in a vessel designed for holding gooey substances, and why on earth has no one thought to improve on the design?

Readers have left 12 comments.

1. Guest User

If they didn't have the hole they'd be too big. The hole keeps the cross section profile down.

2. psycholoonie

dude. are you talking about bagels. or something else. nasty. stop talking about holes.

3. mr hand

Uh, haven't you seen family guy? Mystery solved:

"Well, I'm gonna go microwave a bagel and have sex with it."

"Butter's in the fridge!"

4. dmc218

I don't think bagels were originally designed to be sliced in half, toasted, and covered with gooey substances. The hole is vestigial. Like the appendix.

5. Guest User

yeah, and people have their appendixes removed all the time. But.... even the best surgeon can't remove a hole. you can't remove nothing from something.

it's time for a bagel revolution.

6. psycholoonie

But.... even the best surgeon can't remove a hole.

— Guest User

You'd be surprised how far modern plastic surgery has come...

Ok, can we PLEASE stop talking about holes.

7. Chris

Dude, you are the one who keeps bringing up the holes thing.

8. SmittenKitten

The hole? It's obviously the marketing. It just wouldn't be a bagel, if it didn't have a hole. It makes it unique. If it looked like a Salisbury steak, no one would ever care to buy it. Boring!

9. Shenks

Smitten. So what you are saying goes something like this:

Thousands of years ago, there was Dude A selling a Salisbury piece of dough and Dude B selling a dough with a hole...but no one bought from Dude A, and "bagel" stuck around.

10. SmittenKitten

Yes, Dude B's marketing was much better. Obviously. A hole? It's ingenious!

He must have been like, "this unrisen bread looks just like the recent invention...a wheel!"

11. Boscorelli

Here I thought it was because they were all cooked on a gigantic stick.

12. swesson

So, why do donuts have holes? Wait, here's an idea! Bagel holes!!!

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