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Submitted by Fuck
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My roommate likes to play a game. He comes home from work, waits about 15 minutes, and then starts making jokes. The damn fool is pretty clever, and I can't help but laugh most of the time.
But sometimes it just pisses me off. Maybe its because I feel fucked up in life right now. Maybe its because he's the only person that actually chooses to interact with me on any kind of a regular basis. For whatever reason, I'm pissed.
Seriously, the first thirty times he calls me gay in any of his intelligent and well-put-together jokes, I laugh. But every fucking night? I seriously just want to break something now.
And the fucking idiot doesn't take my reaction seriously. That's what pisses me off the most. Its like, fuck dude, at some point you might want to consider that I'm a little bit unhappy with the way you talk to me.
Here's a good example. After two or three jokes, without me responding in any way, he continues. So I get up and walk to my room, shut the door, and go to bed. He keeps going.
I thought that maybe after I started yelling "FUCK DUDE, WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?" loud enough for all the damn neighbours to hear, perhaps he might cease and desist. No such luck.
To top it off, tonight it was about Lord of the fucking Rings. After 3 hours of goddamn mayhem and death, a slight bit of emotional tension has built up. So here I am, just finished working out, and I'm watching the last little bit of the movie. My roommate walks in, and three minutes later he's telling me how gay I am, how much I must like the movie because hobbits are like little boys.
I'm not just irritated by his disregard for the fact that I'm watching a damn movie - oh, he'd be pissed if I started talking to him while he's watching some stupid freaking movie from the 80's - but now, he's making some stupid fucking gay joke.
So here I sit, typing merrily away on my computer. I'm far too pissed to go to bed, and I need to go use the loon before I do, so I'll have to interact with him at least once more.
What the fuck am I supposed to do? Reason doesn't work. Swearing at him doesn't work. Joking back works, but that's his goal anyway - he wants me to fucking prank him... its all part of his little fucking game.
But, it isn't part of my fucking game. I don't have a fucking game. I'm just trying to freaking survive and it isn't the best time in my life right now. Actually, its pretty much the worst... Except of course for back in the day, as a teenager - that pretty much sucked too.
I just don't want to put up with all this fucking shit. Its nonstop, incessant, unending, and like I said, the guy is good at making these damn jokes.
I really don't know what to do. I can:
1) swear and be pissed, which works temporarily but has negative consequences for me (like being wired awake for the next 3 hours)
2) talk to him seriously and watch as he twists my comments into his game
3) play the game.
4) find a new fucking roommate. but like I said, this is the only other human being in the fucking world that actually chooses to spend time with me. more than once. for longer than a fucking year. or two. or four. fuck my goddamn friends, I wish they'd go to the fucking hell.
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