UnleashYourAnger.com

Thank God I found this site. I need to a place to anonymously bitch and complain instead of bottling it all up. I've been bottling it up for years- I have no more room for any more bottles unless I put on (yet) more weight- which, let's face it, is a temporary solution to an ongoing problem.

I'm so DONE with tech. I've spent easily half of my life learning and working with it. It's truly my passion and probably the biggest part of my life. In many ways, without it, I don't know who I am. But I'm sick of it. More specifically I'm sick of being TREATED as though I don't know WTF I'm doing. Worst of all- much of it is coming from my own FAMILY! I say or suggest one thing, they blatently go against it. The family business needed a client database system- I built a web-based one for the network. They ditch it and PAY to use some other P.O.S. (NOT 'Point of Sale', 'Piece Of...') one that is amateurish at best! They're all in a tither today because the software they bought won't let you print invoices with anything beyond Office 2003 (or was it XP?). Ya- that's great software. I tried entering a client into it yesterday- it wouldn't even insert the data! And I had to select the client ID used in the database! WHY am *I* having to do that when that's the role of the software!?!?!? Pathetic! But 'they' swear by this P.O.S! I (their own family) build something exactly what they want and they see it as sh*t- but because some kid coded something and suckered them into buying it for hundreds of $$$- it's freakin' gold to them! Whatever.
And that's just the tip of the iceberg. I'm a developer, a programmer. But they only consider me to be an "IT" guy that fixes virus problems and installs scanners instead of someone who is creative and ambitious. I spent hundreds of hours building a VPN for them to connect to their clients- never got paid for it- never charge the client for the connectivity convenience, and they almost never use it anyways! Well wasn't that a waste of my time! All the while, if one thing doesn't work with it (ya know, technical limitations or other anomalies- namely, 'Windows'), then they almost immediately pipe up with "well why don't we just use GoToMyPC?". There's nothing more infuriating, not to mention insulting, then to suggest using something that you are, essentially, in direct competition with, when you're RIGHT THERE. Even to say it behind my back isn't much better. How about SUPPORTING me and giving me the RESOURCES necessary to make it better than sh*t all over what I've done and suggest something you saw on a g*dd*mn infomercial on TV!!!

The irony is that when THEY have a client that questions the work THEY have done, they become extremely infuriated and insulted too. Yet they do the EXACT same thing to me without hesitation, and they're COMPLETELY oblivious to it!

Most of the software they use is sh*t- but if I suggest something better, in their eyes, I don't know what I'm talking about. Nothing new. But again- it's insulting.

They CLAIM that they want to see me succeed with my tech spinoff of the company, but they only want me to succeed the way THEY want me to succeed- not in software development- but by fixing people's 'puters and showing them how to import photos from their camera (something that 'they' themselves don't know how to do). "There's no money in software development", they tell me. I have ambitions to find VC or grants to fund the development of a web-based alternative to the sh*t they use, and they tell me it "isn't worth doing- ABC company has that market all locked up". Yeah- tell that to companies like Google that played with the 'big boys' and are now a major force in the industry. According to their mentality, Google shouldn't have bothered because Microsoft already had things "locked up".

I was let go from my last development gig last year. It, like it would for many people I'm sure, knocked me down a few pegs and my confidence has been waning ever since. Surely my own family would help lift me up and help build my confidence again, right? WRONG! In some ways they have cut me down more than I was by being "let go". After I was "let go" I was actively working towards those grants and putting together plans for how to move forward with my tech career. Now, a year later, I'm almost ready to give up on it altogether. But what am I without it? I spent so much of my life focusing on tech that I don't even know what I'd be qualified for outside of it! Not meant to sound like a pity party, but since I'm obviously not getting any support from those closest to me- where the h3ll am I supposed to get it from!? And if I can't- is there any point in continuing??

I've seen ideas I've had for years come to fruition by someone else- and making THEM successful. I've missed the (proverbial) boat so many times I wonder whether I should even bother coming back to the (proverbial) dock!

Between the disappointment and the lack of trust- I'm just about ready to say FUCK it to all of it. I'm insulted, I'm pissed off, and frankly, I just don't give a FUCK anymore.