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Moving on is hard for everyone... |
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Submitted by lonelywidow
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Why is the world so judgemental? My husband passed away two months ago. I had the happiest life in the world with him, and suddenly all of the happiness and joy in my life has been snatched away. I can't bear it anymore. I hate being a widow. Now that I know the joy of love and married life, I don't want to live any other way. I want to date again. I still love my late husband, and I will always love him, but I can't bear all of the saddness, mourning, and lonliness of being a widow. The thing is, people expect a widow to wait for a long time, like a year before dating again. Anyone who starts dating immediately after their husband passes away is seen as trashy and desperate. Well those people should try walking in my shoes before judging me. All I want is to be happy again, like I was. Why is it such a crime to want happiness again? To want all of this emptiness and sorrow to go away? I met a wonderful man, a handsome, moral, family-oriented doctor who's interested in me. I mentioned it to my family, and they were horrified and want me to reject him and not even consider dating for at least a year. So I have to be sad and lonely and in mourning for a whole year, and reject this wonderful man who would be great for both me and my children. Why is the world so judgemental?! Divorced people can begin dating right away. Why are widows expected to be sad and alone? It's not fair. It's just not fair. It's bad enough I just lost my wonderful husband, but to not be able to seek happiness for at least a year just adds to my misery. Why doesn't my family understand that?
Readers have left 2 comments. 1. Guest User I can certainly understand that... and I'm only 22!! Your husband would want you to be happy and to not mourn or wallow in sadness for a year before dating. That's just silly and I'm sure he'd give those people that are judging you a piece of his mind if he could. Go ahead and do what makes you happy, and remember your husband and the great times you've had. I bet this new guy could even be a great person to have in your life given this difficult time. But there's no use in all the sadness and grief. Who ever said that death was really the end of everything and everything should stop and mourn forever what they can't control was an unenlightened idiot. 2. Guest User I'm so sorry about your husband. Many people assume that you can't love another man and still love your husband, but I don't believe that. I think love is something that never runs out, that you can date this doctor and love this doctor and still love your husband very very much. I think, your husband would have been happy to know he meant so much to you, and that you enjoyed your life with him so much. He'd have wanted you to be happy as well. Just be careful not to mistake companionship for love. When you are lonely, it might be easy to think you love this doctor, because he takes away the loneliness, but make sure you really love him for who he is. If you would love him even when you don't feel lonely, then look forward to a happy life with him <
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